My entry for The Writer’s Voice: Limbo

I’m very excited because my entry for a very cool writing competition was randomly selected #TheWVoice !!

My Query:

Dear Writer’s Voice Judges,

I am currently seeking representation for my 20K supernatural MG novel, LIMBO. Thank you for this opportunity.



Waking up alone on an unfamiliar beach is distressing enough, realizing that you have no memory and don’t even know your own name, that is scary.

When her full scale crying fit fails to attract any attention 14 year old Riley realizes it’s up to her to find help and get herself out of this weird mess. The fact that none of the townspeople even acknowledge her existence proves to be a problem, and the only person to offer any help is a ghost.

The ghost girl says that Riley is dead too and that she’s stuck in this in-between state, because she needs to do something before her soul can be at peace, before she can move on to whatever comes next. When this task turns out to be asking the boy she loved if he loved her in return – in a dream – it’s the cheesiest thing Riley has ever heard!

As Riley soon finds out, the ghost girl hasn’t been entirely honest, she’s more interested in taking care of her own unfinished business and her deception could cost Riley everything.

When Riley’s memories return, she remembers all the reasons she had for giving up on her life – the death of her mom, the new start her dad was trying to make – and she realizes being stuck in limbo is her own fault, and it’s not what she really wants. Riley has been granted the opportunity to fix the mistakes she has made in her own life and she must overcome her fear and anger and accept the love that’s really important, or lose her second chance altogether.


First 250

There’s a salty tang to the air and my stomach flips like I’m falling. I know I’m not, I can feel the ground pressing against my body. I sit up slowly, wiping gritty sand from my face, trying to quell the sour threat of vomit. My whole body aches, but I don’t think I’m hurt.

Everything seems to be working properly.


I blink, and try to get my bearings. Nothing I see helps me out. An empty moonlit beach should sound poetic. I’m trying really hard not to get creeped out. I swallow the lump in my throat, and my fear. What am I supposed to do? Think, think. I try to force coherent thoughts through my clouded brain.

Don’t panic, be smart. Look for clues.

There’s something close by, a dark shape. What is that, a dog? Or maybe driftwood? It’s not moving, is it? A shiver runs through me. Wait, it’s a backpack. I scramble over the sand and grab the bag in both hands like it’s a life preserver. There has to be something useful in here, something mine. Emptying the bag I find a hairbrush, a disposable camera, a granola bar and a book. I stare at the objects in front of me, the spike of hope plummeting. I must have missed something. I search through the pack again. No wallet? No money? No phone? I check everything for a name, initials. I don’t find any.

Pockets! I stumble to my feet, cramming my hands into even the smallest most useless pocket of my jeans. My fingers grasp nothing but lint.



8 thoughts on “My entry for The Writer’s Voice: Limbo

  1. The setting comes across with real power in these few words. It feels like Limbo and makes be feel for the MC. Good luck in the competition!

  2. Good luck in the contest!

  3. Good luck in the contest!

  4. miriam spitzer franklin says:

    Interesting start and unique twist on a ghost story! Good luck in the contest!

  5. csschwarz says:

    Sounds like a couple of good hooks and I really like the title as it pertains to the story! Good luck with your book!

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